68 more days and I will have had xanga for a full 1000 days.  Wow.  I feel lame.

I don't know how long that no of mine is going to last....

So the boy is really nice.  I do like him.  Not as much as he likes me, but I still like him.  Friday he took me on a date and showed up at my door with a dozen pink roses and two mixed CD's crammed full of indie music. (I LOVE indie music)  He was really nervous, and it made me smile.  We had a really fun night.  Went to dinner and a movie (Super Bad is not a good movie), then over to his house to just chill, watched another movie (We watched The Robinson's to purify ourselves after Super Bad) and then Scrubs.  I forgot how awesome cuddling is.  He asked me to be his girlfriend, but after thinking for a few days I told him no.  I dunno you guys.  It's just too soon I guess.  I don't know him that well, and I heard some rumors.  I don't know if they're true, but I know I should know whether or not they are before I date him.  I think we should just be friends for awhile before rushing into anything.  It was moving kinda fast.  I dunno.  Things are really awkward now, and we haven't been talking much.  I realized today that I miss him.  He's one of my only friends here.  I'm just really good at chasing boys away.

It's weird to miss somebody new.

I'm at this time in my life where I haven't been sure who my real friends are.  I still have my core group of friends that have always been there, but certain others that I thought were so close and cared so much have been showing me otherwise.  I'm not gonna lie, it's been really hurtful.  Although, it has brought me to a certain realization.  I was wondering who my best friend in the entire world was, and you know who came to mind?  My mother.  The sole person who has been there through everything, who I can't hide anything from, the advice I trust the most, my number one lady is my mom.  It's pretty cool.  I'm so thankful that our relationship is so close, and that I've been blessed with such an awesome Mom.  So Mama, this is for you.  I just thought that you should know you're amazing, and I love you.

So this guy likes me A LOT.

I haven't quite figured out what my feelings are.